A Final Kiss Before You Disappear
My knuckles grasp all that they see,
clutching tight in silent plea.
A fear whispers, soft yet clear—
One day, I might just disappear down the street.
Something tightens in my chest,
my grip turns white, yet not the best.
I lie awake through restless nights,
only to run in broad daylight.
I work, I sweat, I give, I try,
but nothing ever feels just right.
A memory drifts into my mind—
your hands, once warm, once intertwined.
You held me close, you dried my tears,
soothed my foolish, fleeting fears.
Afraid I’d vanish down the street,
not my dreams—just me, incomplete.
I held you tight, I begged to stay,
"One more dance, just one more day."
One more chance, one fleeting kiss,
we laughed as rain fell into mist.
We danced through pain, a reckless art—
if only fire could cleanse my heart.
How foolish were my rosy eyes,
seeing heroes in disguise.
You were no dream, no grand delight—
just a ghost of a past lives.
Yet you never held me tight,
not a second spared to fight.
A master of words so soft, so sweet,
how many fell beneath your feet?
Yet none have hurt me quite like you,
I let you cut, I let you bruise.
Now I hold myself instead,
drown in echoes, past regrets.
The more I remember, the more I yearn—
to forget your touch in strangers’ arms.
I hate the fallen autumn leaves,
too green, too gold, they make me grieve.
In the dark, you haunt my dreams—
how quickly love turned into screams.
Your mind, a maze of fear and doubt,
you never let those voices out.
I tire of painting you so bright,
to justify your lack of fight.
I thought I knew you well, my love,
built my trust, brick by brick.
But while I waited, aching, true,
you lay careless in Marseille’s view.
You said you missed me—oh, the game—
I hope she holds you just the same.
You’ll return with glittered lies,
and I’ll be here, but not to rise.
I loved you, flaws and all,
I should have let you go that fall.
But how could I release you when
I held so tight, again, again?
With great love, comes greater pain,
a lesson learned, a scar remains.
You gifted me these feelings deep,
yet do you feel your own deceit?
I loved you—all you are.
You loved my love, not me by far.
And in the end, the guilt ran wild,
I held you close when you allowed,
but where were you as I unraveled inside out?
The final day, your hand in mine,
for once, you hold it, hold it tight.
Then at last, you let it slip,
one final kiss—
before you disappear down the street.
